


Light A Fire In My Eyes

by alexmercer



Series: And You’re A Part Of Me - JatP Soulmate AU [1]
Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Bisexual Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), Canon Gay Character, F/F, F/M, First Dates, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting to Know Each Other, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Lesbian Carrie Wilson, Lesbian Flynn (Julie and The Phantoms), Luke Patterson Loves Julie Molina, M/M, Music, Platonic Soulmates, Questioning, Romantic Soulmates, Transgender Luke Patterson (Julie and The Phantoms), author doesn't know how to write angst but tries her best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 19,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27452314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexmercer/pseuds/alexmercer
Summary: Julie didn't want a soulmate.Alex was afraid to find his.Reggie wasn't sure they meant anything at all.But when they all find their soulmates within a few days of each other, can their minds be changed by fate and their other halves?(Soulmate AU - you can only see the world in the colour of your soulmate's eyes until you meet, in which case you can see all colours. After your soulmate dies, you can only see in black and white.)
Relationships: Alex & Carrie Wilson, Alex/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Carlos Molina & Julie Molina & Ray Molina, Flynn & Julie Molina, Flynn & Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), Flynn/Carrie Wilson, Julie Molina & Ray Molina, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Series: And You’re A Part Of Me - JatP Soulmate AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2020430
Comments: 202
Kudos: 598





	1. Julie - Music Class

Part 1 - Two Worlds Collide

Julie Molina and the universe did not see eye to eye, which was entirely the reason she had sworn off soulmates forever, including her own.

It didn’t matter that everything she saw was the most beautiful shade of sea blue, tinged green and glassy, the same colour as her soulmate’s eyes. It didn’t matter that it was the most calming, bright, joyful colour she could have ever thought of. No matter how perfect his eyes were when she finally saw them, Julie Molina was not going to be with her soulmate.

There was only one reason, and that was purely to spite the universe, or the powers that be, or whatever great entity it was that made all the decisions about what happened in the world. If it hadn’t been for one of those other decisions, Julie would have been only too happy to find her soulmate and live happily ever after. In fact, up until last year, that had been her plan.

But the universe, as it was wont to do, made its decision and it took away the person Julie had loved the most. When Julie’s mother got sick, she would tell her daughter that everything happened for a reason, that the universe had decided this needed to happen and in time it would decide if Rose Molina would live or die. She had told Julie that whatever happened would be for the best, that she wasn’t afraid and Julie didn’t need to be either. But it was difficult to take that advice when sat beside her mother’s hospital bed, next to whirring machines and monitors.

At Rose’s funeral, Julie swore off soulmates. If she found someone she loved even half as much as she’d loved her mother, then she’d be vulnerable all over again. The possibility of loss was a fresh and gaping wound that Julie could not – _would_ not – prod.

She didn’t explain all this whenever anyone asked why she wasn’t interested in soulmates. Instead, she’d tell them she wanted to find somebody she truly loved, not whoever the universe had picked out of a hat. And part of that was true too – how did the universe make its decisions? Was the love soulmates felt so strong because they’d been conditioned to think it had to feel that way? Was there any truth in soulmates at all?

She knew what she thought of those questions though. While she didn’t want one, Julie knew that soulmates were real and a thing to be treasured. The love her parents had displayed was inimitable, the most real and honest and pure phenomenon Julie had ever seen. Ray would tell his children stories from before he’d met Rose, tell them how brown was the most deep and alluring colour he could think of after years and years of seeing everything in the colour of his soulmate’s eyes. He would joke about how part of him wished they’d never met and he’d never been able to see all colours, because the brown of Rose’s eyes took his breath away every time and it was all he ever wanted to see.

But now Ray only saw in black and white.

Hence, Julie Molina did not want a soulmate, and her plan was to ignore him if she ever found him.

The universe made sure her plan was doomed to failure from the start.

The bell of Los Feliz High School rang shrilly and every chair in every classroom was scraped back in unison as students hurried to pick up their bags to go home. It was Friday, the end of Julie’s first week as a sophomore, and she would have loved to just head on home like everyone else. But instead, she gathered all her things and headed to the ground floor for her extracurricular music sessions.

Julie loved music. There were very few things that brought her peace, but music was one of them. It brought her closer to her mother, which was actually the reason it had been so hard to play again once she’d died, but now Julie would play at every chance she got. The memories were painful but pure, and nowhere were they stronger than sat at a piano, fingers gently flying across the keys.

Julie took her seat at the back of the room, flipping through some sheet music as the rest of the after-school music class filed in. She looked at a few faces as they entered the room, but there wasn’t anyone she really recognised or spoke to.

Eventually, Mrs Harrison, the music teacher, stood up at the front of the room and got everyone’s attention.

“Good afternoon, everyone,” Mrs Harrison said, smiling widely. She was Julie’s favourite teacher – she had been incredibly patient while Julie was still struggling to play music in the wake of Rose’s death. “I’m so glad you could all make it and that you all decided to join our after-school music programme. Now, ordinarily I’d start you off on smaller projects, but I actually have some exciting news to tell you all.”

There were excited murmurs throughout the room and Julie sat up a little straighter. Mrs Harrison shushed everyone, still beaming.

“Principal Lessa has decided to reinstate the school’s Fall Showcase, and she has asked us – as the music department – to prepare a few performances!”

The murmuring grew louder, excited whispers and exclamations of delight sounding throughout the room. Julie smiled; really she was in the music programme for some easy extra credit, the music just being a bonus, but if she got to prepare songs and perform for a crowd then it could be a lot more fun.

“Quiet down, please,” Mrs Harrison said, raising her hands. The class quieted. “You’ll have one month to come up with an original song to perform. I’ve made a list of pairs or groups I think could make something really special together. These are non-negotiable.”

As Mrs Harrison started listing everyone’s names and people began drifting off into their assigned groups, Julie looked around the classroom. This was one thing she hated about everything being monochrome blue – it could often be difficult to tell the difference between people if they looked even slightly similar, and details were hard to make out. She couldn’t tell who in the class there was left for her to be in a group or pair with.

“And finally,” said Mrs Harrison, “Julie Molina and Luke Patterson. I think the two of you could come up with a really impressive duet if you set your minds to it. You’ll complement each other very nicely.”

Luke Patterson – she knew that name. He was a junior, incredibly talented from what she’d heard, and he was in a band called Sunset Curve. A quick glance around the room told her that none of his bandmates were here; if they had been, they would have been grouped together for sure.

Dreadful butterflies swelled in her stomach. She was sure Luke was nice enough, but the thought of playing alongside someone so well-known in school for his music was extremely daunting. That, and she wasn’t sure she’d even seen the guy in person before, let alone spoken to him. It was a big step from strangers to duet partners.

Julie had been so caught up in her thoughts of the boy that she hardly noticed when someone came and sat beside her, clearing their throat. She jumped, startled, and then looked to see a boy sat next to her.

They locked eyes for just a second. His were the brightest blue she had ever seen.

The world burst into colour.

For a moment, or maybe an eternity, the two of them just stared at each other, dumbfounded. Like most people, Julie had been taught from a young age to recognise all different colours, even though she could only see one, which was how she knew that this boy – Luke Patterson, her _soulmate_ – had lovely brown hair (but a questionable haircut), was wearing a faded red tank top, and had a long gold chain hung around his neck. He was looking at her with those incredible blue eyes and the most cheerful smile on his boyish face.

Forget duet partners – it was a big step from strangers to _soulmates_.

Julie hadn’t been prepared for this to happen today. Who ever thinks they’ll find their soulmate that they don’t even want in an extracurricular music class? So, she did the mature thing that anyone in her position would do: She acted as if nothing had happened at all.

Luke was the first to move. He awkwardly cleared his throat again, then held out his hand for Julie to shake. “I’m Luke,” he said, and his voice was full of hope and happiness. “It’s really, really nice to meet you. I guess we’re, uh…”

“Yep. Duet partners,” Julie finished. Luke’s smile faltered with confusion, but Julie ignored the guilty feeling in the pit of her stomach. She didn’t shake his hand and he let it fall limply to his side.

“I was actually going to say we’re s–”

“We should really get started on our song,” Julie interrupted, and she stood up, walking to the piano at the front of the classroom, leaving Luke (looking hurt and bewildered) to trail after her like a lost puppy.

This was going to be unbearable.


	2. Alex - The Orpheum

Part 1 - Two Worlds Collide

Brown, Alex thought, was the most gorgeous colour in existence and nothing could change his mind. Granted, it was the only colour he could see so he didn’t have a lot to compare it to, but that didn’t detract from its beauty in the slightest. Whenever he’d met people who had found their soulmates and could see all colours, they would tell him that brown was dull and that he had a lot of other more exciting colours to look forward to, but Alex wouldn’t hear of it. Brown was warm, soft, depthless, solid, secure, smooth, and he never wanted to look at another colour in his life.

That, he told himself, was the reason he didn’t want to find his soulmate – he didn’t want to see any other colours. In his heart of hearts, he knew that wasn’t the real reason.

There were lots of reasons he was worried about finding his soulmate. First and foremost, Alex didn’t cope well with change. He never had and he didn’t think he ever would. Right now, he was comfortable – he had a great band, great friends, school was going well and he hadn’t fought with his parents in almost three weeks. What if he were to find his soulmate now? It would upset the balance of everything and then he’d be back to where he’d been before, an anxious wreck, worried about waking up in the morning.

He supposed there was also a fear of being in a relationship. If this whole soulmate thing were really accurate, they’d fit together like pieces of a jigsaw. His soulmate would know him inside and out, and that thought was terrifying. Alex wasn’t sure he even knew himself that well – how could somebody else?

And he would be expected to do the same. What if he was terrible at it? What if he was such a bad boyfriend that his soulmate decided he wasn’t worth it? Worse yet, what if his soulmate didn’t want him at all?

Then there was the matter of his parents. They didn’t like the fact that he was gay to begin with; what would happen if he brought his soulmate home to meet them one day? Would they forbid their relationship? Would they kick Alex out of the house? He didn’t know and he didn’t _want_ to know.

The whole idea of soulmates scared the living daylights out of him.

It didn’t get any better after Luke told his horror story about meeting his soulmate the day before as they set up for band practise that morning. Luke said that they’d met in his music class after school, but–

“She _hates_ me,” Luke had whined, striking a dissonant chord on his guitar at full volume. Alex had winced and covered his ears, leaning over his drum kit slightly to turn down the amp. “I’ve not even done anything, and she hates me. She wouldn’t let me get _near_ the word ‘soulmate’.”

“It is a pretty weighty word,” Alex supplied, but he was ignored.

Reggie, Sunset Curve’s bassist, had consolingly patted Luke’s shoulder. “I’m sure she’ll come round,” he had said. “You’re a catch. Anyone would be lucky to have you. I’m almost jealous that you’re not _my_ soulmate.”

Luke had smiled solemnly. “Thanks, Reg.”

The whole story had got Alex thinking _what if my soulmate hates me too?_

Instead of going back home after band practise (which, apart from when Luke burst into tears halfway through and Alex had tried to console him while Reggie ordered them a pizza, had gone perfectly well), Alex headed to his favourite place: the streets of Hollywood, busy and bustling without being too much, one of the few places Alex felt truly at home.

Most people only visited tourist attractions and busy places after they’d met their soulmates – usually they were places of vibrant colour, a romantic getaway by default – but Alex thought the shades of brown he saw lighting up the street were far more stunning than anything neon and gaudy. There was so much more beauty in one colour than he thought he’d ever find in a thousand.

Alex headed through the streets to nowhere in particular, but wound up where he always did. Even though he had been there a hundred times, alone or with his friends, the Orpheum never failed to amaze him. It was Sunset Curve’s dream to play on that stage, and the Fall Showcase that Mrs Harrison had asked them to perform in could have been their ticket – because of its famously good music programme, lots of managers would come to Los Feliz’s performance.

In the fading daylight, the theatre was all subdued browns, soft tones that didn’t strain the eyes to look at. Its flashing lights were steadily brightening in the setting sun, and two men were changing the lettering on the sign – it currently read: _PANIC! AT THE DI_.

Alex wasn’t sure why he liked the Orpheum so much, apart from its obvious involvement in his plans for the future. Something about theatres had always intrigued him – maybe the way that they were filled to the brim and full of joy when there was a performance on, but empty and sinister when the curtains were closed. That could apply to any theatre though; the Orpheum was something untouchable and spectacular.

This was where he found himself again. Staring at the Orpheum, thinking about his soulmate, considering the future, lost in his own mind and not thinking about everything around him. While his thoughts frightened him, the theatre grounded him. After an hour or so, he got the feeling (like he often did in the streets of Hollywood) that if he just calmed down a little bit then finding his soulmate might not be such a daunting prospect.

Until somebody ruined it.

Alex heard it before he saw it. Somebody yelling, “Coming through!”

Then he saw it. Somebody barrelling towards him on a skateboard, arms flailing, expression hidden as they turned their head away.

Then he felt it. The full-force, breath-stealing collision as the skater knocked into him, sending both of them sprawling to the floor inelegantly, landing in an unceremonious heap.

They disentangled themselves from each other awkwardly, Alex trying to not grumble to himself about rude people. The skater picked up their board and inspected it as Alex checked himself for bruises and scrapes.

“Aw man, you dinged my board!”

At that, Alex looked towards the voice. He had been meaning to tell him off for worrying about an inanimate object’s safety over the person he’d nearly killed, but instead he felt his jaw go slack – this was the most beautiful guy he’d ever seen. His long, dark hair was casually flicked over his shoulder, and he had smile lines around his eyes that made Alex’s heart stutter. His eyes… his beautiful dark brown eyes.

It took Alex far too long to realise that the rest of the world around him suddenly wasn’t brown anymore.

This guy was his soulmate.

“Oh,” the guy said breathlessly, face dumbfoundedly blank. “Hey.”

 _Panic_.

Before he knew what he was doing, Alex was walking away. Well, actually it was hard to tell – his mind was racing and his heart was pumping so there was a high chance that he was actually fleeing the scene like he’d seen a ghost. Perhaps he was screaming bloody murder as he went. Maybe he’d fainted and this was actually happening inside his head. All he knew was that he had to get out of there, get far away, because that was his soulmate and he couldn’t do this today.

It would have been a lot easier to navigate if everything had still been brown, but colours were loud (why had nobody ever warned him about that?) and obtrusive and so much more confusing than he’d thought they would have been. He almost got lost several times, but eventually he turned left onto a small housing estate, out of breath and shaking.

He thought for a moment, finding somewhere out of the way and sitting cross-legged on the pavement. _Breathe, Alex_ , he told himself sternly.

After a while, he collected his thoughts, gathered the facts, laid everything out plain and simple in his mind.

What had just happened? He’d met his soulmate.

How had he reacted? He had panicked and run away without even introducing himself or finding out his soulmate’s name.

How was he feeling? Scared, stupid, fragile, annoyed.

What could he do? Go back, find his soulmate, apologise, and maybe get to know him.

But of course he couldn’t do that. This wasn’t a matter so simple as ‘just go back’. It never would be. Chances were, Alex thought, that he’d found and lost his soulmate in the space of roughly twenty seconds, which had to be some kind of new record.

 _Nice one, Alex_ , he told himself.

Maybe it was time to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the love you've given to this fic in the past 24 hours! It's been great to see your feedback, I'm so glad so many of you like the story. I hope you continue to enjoy it.  
> I'll be updating daily until all 10 chapters are published!  
> 


	3. Reggie - Detention

Part 1 - Two Worlds Collide

Soulmates were overrated. In fact, Reggie wasn’t sure soulmates meant all that much at all.

The thing was, Reggie had very few people he knew who were soulmates, and the ones he did know hardly seemed like a perfect match. First of all, there was Luke, who had only found his soulmate a few days ago but had already somehow ruined it. Then, on Saturday Reggie had got a text from Alex saying that he’d completely butchered his meeting with his soulmate.

And there were his parents. Soulmates, yes, but a fight away from a divorce and hardly in love with each other at all. Reggie thought that they had probably loved each other once, otherwise they wouldn’t have got married, but now their marriage was spluttering and failing like a car that hadn’t been driven in far too long.

Reggie had a lot of theories about soulmates. Maybe they all started out in love, but if the universe got it wrong then their relationships could sour over the years until they simply didn’t care anymore. Or maybe the only criteria was that soulmates had to fit in one way with no specification as to whether their connection was positive or negative. Maybe not all soulmates were supposed to find each other. Maybe some were just better off as friends.

It wasn’t that he didn’t believe in soulmates – he had one himself, somebody with lovely dark brown eyes – it was just that he didn’t trust the system.

The point was, Reggie was very unconvinced on the whole soulmate thing. It didn’t seem to be working out well for anyone he knew. He decided he’d just have to wait until he found his to make his ultimate decision.

It turned out that he didn’t have to wait for very long.

On Monday, Reggie turned up to his last class on the day, English. He sat down in his usual seat beside Luke, with Alex on the table behind them, and got his books out of his bag.

“Alex,” Luke said, turning around in his chair to face the drummer. “What did you get for question nine on the homework?”

Reggie paused. “We had homework?” he asked his friends.

They both looked at him, unimpressed but unsurprised. Reggie was notoriously bad at handing in homework on time. They’d only been back at school for a week and this was the fourth piece of work he simply hadn’t remembered to do. It wasn’t like Reggie was forgetful – in fact, out of the three of them, Reggie had the strangest, most specific memory, it just didn’t extend to remembering when homework was due.

“Great,” he said with a sigh. “Looks like I won’t be able to join you for band practise later.”

He was soon proven right. The English teacher asked the class to hand in their homework, and when Reggie couldn’t, she gave him detention without a moment’s hesitation.

“I’ll keep you back here for an hour and you can do your homework then, Reggie,” she said. “I think there might be a few other students coming for detention as well, but you’ll work in silence. Understood?”

“Loud and clear,” he said. He had thought that was a perfectly fine response, but judging by the glare his teacher sent him he was wrong.

At the end of the lesson (throughout which Reggie attempted to take notes, but ended up gazing out the window, toying with a funky new bassline in his head) Reggie said goodbye to Luke and Alex as they headed home and he remained in the classroom for his detention.

He got his English homework out and started looking through it. It wasn’t difficult – Reggie was naturally academically-inclined and he had completed almost half of it by the time the first distraction came: more people entering the room for detention.

The teacher directed people on where to sit, and Reggie noticed the seat in front of him being taken by a girl. She looked younger than him, maybe a sophomore, and the first word that came to mind when Reggie looked at her was ‘fun’. She had long black hair tied into lots of braids that swung low on her back, she wore a jumper that looked bright and cheerful paired with ripped dungarees. Reggie was struck with the urge to befriend her, and so that was exactly what he did.

He leaned forward and tapped her on the shoulder with his pen. “What are you in for?” he asked, as if they were in a terrible prison movie.

The girl turned around and looked Reggie in the eye. Suddenly, it felt as if the world had been tipped upside down, because now everything was so much brighter. Reggie’s first thought was _Oh, I was right, her jumper is bright pink!_

_Oh, this girl is my soulmate_ was his second thought.

The girl blinked a few times and then positively beamed. She stuck her hand out matter-of-factly, and Reggie shook it without hesitation.

“Thank God I finally found you! Your eyes are totally beautiful, you know,” the girl said, “but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t completely sick of seeing only the colour green everywhere I go.”

Reggie grinned and introduced himself. The girl smiled back and said, “My name’s Flynn.”

He pushed his English homework to the side, abandoning it. He’d do it later. “So,” he said. “What brings you to detention?”

Flynn rolled her eyes. “Do you know Carrie Wilson? I superglued her locker shut.”

Reggie couldn’t help but laugh, and he was delighted when Flynn cracked a smile too. “Why?” he asked her. She simply shrugged.

“Felt like it. How about you?”

“Sadly, nothing quite as interesting as that. I didn’t do my English homework.”

Flynn nodded in understanding. “I get you. I can never remember to do homework. I’ve missed five assignments since school started.”

“Me too,” Reggie exclaimed. “It’s like we’re the same person.”

Flynn grinned and fist-bumped Reggie. So far, he’d say his experience with his own soulmate was going pretty well.

The pair of them talked all through the rest of detention. Despite what the teacher had said about working in silence, she seemed to have figured out that there was something between them, because she didn’t scold them the entire time. By the time the school bell rang and they were released, Reggie was reluctant to let their conversation end; they’d only just got onto the subject of their favourite pizzas!

“Here’s my number,” he said to Flynn, handing her a piece of scrap paper as they left the building. “Text me later, alright?”

“Sure,” Flynn said. “Later, Reginald.”

He was about to tell her not to call him that, but she was already walking away. He shook his head, smiling fondly, and headed home too.

Reggie’s home wasn’t exactly the nicest of places a lot of the time. On a good day, conversation was stilted and forced. On a bad day, there was either too much noise or far too little. That day, he thought that he could go home and tell his parents that he’d found his soulmate. Maybe they’d be so happy that they wouldn’t argue with him or each other, just for a little bit. But he could hear raised voices before he even opened the door.

They were in the kitchen, shouting at each other. He’d learnt by now that if he listened hard enough he could tell where they were and avoid that room altogether. As quiet as possible, Reggie headed up the stairs to his bedroom (avoiding the creaky stair that sounded like a dying cat) and shut himself away.

He picked up his bass, sighing at its familiar, comforting weight in his hands, and began playing the bassline he’d thought up in English. It didn’t sound quite as good when he actually played it as it had in his head. As he played, his father knocked loudly on the door and told him to turn down the damn volume.

“You’re one to talk,” Reggie had muttered, but he did it anyway.

Not long later, he got a text through from Flynn. All it said was _Hey, you free to hang out at mine later?_ but it made Reggie’s heart soar. He didn’t think what he and Flynn had was romantic, but he thought at that moment that it felt how it was supposed to – a simple text from her and he was grinning like an idiot.

This was what it felt like to have a soulmate: happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no one else to tell this to but I'm proud of myself so I'm putting it here: I did two GCSE History mocks and I got 9s on both of them!  
> Anyways, thank you again for all the love you're giving this fic. It's insane and your comments make me smile so much. This is the final POV, so from now on there's more Julie, Alex and Reggie chapters. All the chapters will be longer from now on.


	4. Julie - The Studio

Part 2 - The Truth Is Finally Breaking Through

“I don’t understand why you don’t just go for it! He clearly likes you and he doesn’t seem like a terrible person. Just give it a go and see what happens!”

“I’ve told you, it’s a matter of principle. I’ve sworn off soulmates, so I’ve sworn off soulmates. I’m not breaking that vow for _my actual soulmate_.”

Walking home from school, Julie repeated this conversation with her best friend, Flynn, for the fifth time in as many days. Since she’d relayed the story of how she met Luke and repeatedly blew off his attempts to talk about being soulmates, Flynn had been trying to convince her to ‘just give it a go and see what happens’. It hadn’t helped that two days ago Flynn had found her own soulmate and she had been gushing about how great it was.

“But you said he’s a nice guy,” Flynn pushed.

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean I have to date him,” Julie returned.

“So you’re going to go back to having a pointless crush on Nick?”

“That crush wasn’t pointless! He liked me back,” Julie protested. It was true, the crush hadn’t been pointless – Julie had dated Nick, a friend from several of her classes, for a little over four months before both of them had decided it wasn’t working.

“So you _are_ going to go back to him?” Flynn asked, sounding outraged and judgemental.

“ _No_. I’m going to… I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

They had reached Julie’s house – she could just about hear her brother and father talking inside through the open window. Carlos said something and Ray laughed loudly; in her mind’s eye, Julie could see him playfully ruffling Carlos’s hair.

Flynn shrugged. “It’s your choice, Jules. But I would hurry up and make it, if I were you. It’s not fair to string him along or get his hopes up.”

“Trust me, that’s the last thing I want to do. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Flynn waved goodbye as Julie entered her house. She dumped her bag in the hallway and headed to the kitchen, which was empty. She thought about what Flynn had said as she absent-mindedly went to the fridge and pulled out a carton of orange juice. Luke had been the only thing on her mind since Friday, and although she knew she had been nothing but cold towards him, she still thought he was a very nice person and the thought of his smile made her stomach flip. That was decidedly not allowed.

She chose not to think about it.

Julie poured herself a glass of orange juice and for a moment was mesmerised. Orange was a much brighter colour than she had expected – it was vibrant and happy, stark in its contrast to the melancholy blue she’d grown so used to.

“Hang on a moment,” came Ray Molina’s voice. Julie looked up to see her father leaning against the doorframe, a delighted smile on his face. “There’s only two reasons you’d be staring at that juice like that – either you’ve just taken a sip and discovered it’s three weeks out of date, or you can see the colour orange. Julie, have you found your soulmate?”

Julie felt her face flush, mild panic setting in. For something to do with her hands, she checked the sell-by date on the orange juice, found that it actually was three weeks out of date, and poured it down the sink along with the contents of her glass.

“Um…” she said noncommittally.

Ray clapped his hands and grinned, clearly taking her response to be affirmative. “Oh, Julie, I am so happy for you! My little girl is all grown up!”

He hurried over to her and pulled her into a crushing hug. For a second, Julie hugged him back (Ray gave the best hugs, she wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity) but then she pushed him away.

“What’s his name?” Ray asked excitedly. “What does he look like? Is he nice? I hope he’s nice. Should we invite him round for dinner later this week? We could do it when your tía is over, I’m sure she would love to meet him too–”

“Dad,” Julie interrupted. Ray abruptly stopped talking, looking apologetic. “Stop it.”

“I’m sorry, honey, I’m just excited for you. Soulmates are a wonderful thing, I’m glad you’ve found yours.”

“I know, dad.” She took a deep, grounding breath, then said, “His name is Luke. He’s a junior at my school, we’ve been partnered for a music project. He’s nice.”

Ray grinned again. “That’s wonderful, sweetheart.” His expression turned suddenly serious. “I should tell you, uh… the facts. If you do anything, you need to stay safe, understand? Make sure you use–”

“Dad, _no_ ,” Julie said frantically, waving her arms for a moment, then covering her ears. “God no! I don’t need you to tell me that! It’s not like that! I’m not going to date him.”

Julie’s father looked bewildered for a moment, but then a look of realisation passed over him. “Oh. I’m sorry, sweetie, I completely forgot that you didn’t, uh… didn’t want a soulmate. You don’t think you’ll change your mind? Now that you’ve met him and had a chance to talk?”

Julie sighed. “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

He nodded. “Okay, honey. I’m sorry. When will you next see him?”

“I have music on Thursdays and Fridays, so tomorrow afternoon.”

“And does he know you don’t want a soulmate?”

She looked at the ground sheepishly, then shook her head. “I haven’t had the heart to tell him yet.”

“I know it’s difficult,” Ray told her, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder, “but if you really don’t want to be with your soulmate then it’s only fair for you to tell him that.”

“I know,” she replied, nodding. “I know. Flynn said the same thing. It’s just hard. I don’t want to upset him.”

Ray gave her a quick kiss on the top of her head. “I know you’ll do the right thing, sweetie.”

Julie wasn’t so sure.

The next day, Julie headed into the extracurricular music class with a plan in mind – she was going to explain to Luke that she didn’t want a soulmate and that she was very sorry if that was upsetting, but she wasn’t going to tell him why. She was fairly certain that sharing trauma was a very soulmate-y thing to do, and that was exactly what she was anxious to avoid.

The plan fell apart the moment she entered the music room. Luke was sat at the back of the room, tuning his six string, and when Julie walked in his head snapped up. Their eyes met and Luke offered a nervous smile. Julie hated that she’d made him nervous like that from the way she’d acted on their first meeting – somebody with a smile like Luke’s should have been happy all the time – so she returned it tightly as she made her way over to him. At the returned gesture, Luke’s smile widened tenfold. Julie didn’t have the heart to erase it by saying she wanted hardly anything to do with him.

God, she was in trouble with this.

She sat down beside him and got out her music.

“Hey,” Luke greeted, still smiling hopefully. “How are you?”

“I’m alright,” Julie said, then for the sake of politeness she added, “You?”

Luke beamed. Julie ignored the twisting in the pit of her stomach. “I’m great. Really great actually. I came up with a really good melody, if you want to hear it? I got my band to help me out a bit.”

Julie nodded, infinitely glad that he was focusing on the music rather than the elephant in the room. “Yeah, let’s hear it.”

Luke cleared his throat, played a pleasant chord that sent shivers up Julie’s spine, then began to sing.

_Staying out until late,_

_That feeling would be so great,_

_But I think we’ve reached a stalemate,_

_Even though she is my soulmate._

Oh. There was the elephant.

He carried on singing, and it became increasingly clear that the lyrics were about Julie, even if she was never mentioned by name. Luke kept singing about how much he had been looking forward to meeting his soulmate and now he was worried that he’d done something to ruin it. Throughout, he kept looking to Julie, fragile hope in his eyes – she just smiled awkwardly.

It didn’t help that Luke’s voice was positively electrifying.

He played the last gentle chord and then looked to Julie with anticipation in his eyes. “So? What do you think?”

Julie hesitated for just a moment then made her decision and said, “I don’t like it.”

The hurt in Luke’s eyes cut deeper than a blade and Julie had to physically look away. He looked almost dazed, like someone had come up behind him and smacked him over the head. Perhaps, Julie thought, she could have said something a little nicer.

For the next hour, Julie revised Luke’s lyrics, written out in a tattered songbook. His handwriting was barely legible, but she picked out every word that looked vaguely like ‘soulmate’ and changed it, so by the time she was done the song was totally different.

Luke inspected her work and then frowned. “I worked really hard on that, you know. And I don’t think we should ignore this.”

Julie pursed her lips. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, you do,” Luke insisted. He was starting to look fed up, maybe a little angry. Julie didn’t want to keep gaslighting him, but she wasn’t sure what else she could do. She didn’t have it in her to say outright that she didn’t want to be soulmates.

Especially when part of her was thinking that it might not even be true anymore.

But a much bigger part of her was not going to let the universe win.

“No,” she told him forcefully. He jolted back a little, startled. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. We’re not doing this.”

Luke didn’t respond for a moment. The silence was painful, but not as painful as the quiet, “Oh,” he let out after a moment or two.

The bell rang, and ordinarily Julie would have practically leapt from the classroom to avoid the awkward situation. But they had barely done anything during the session and she was eager to get this project over and done with as quickly as possible.

With a sigh, Julie said, “Do you want to carry on working at my place? We can use my mom’s studio and actually get some work done.”

Luke, avoiding eye contact, replied, “Sure. I need to stop off at my place first though, grab my electric guitar. Do you need a ride?”

“Yeah. Thanks. We have an amp in the studio, so you won’t need to bring one yourself.”

He nodded curtly. “Alright. My car is in the parking lot.”

The two of them headed through the school in silence, walking extremely far apart. Julie almost regretted inviting him over (she scolded herself for not considering what her dad or Carlos could say when she brought Luke into the house) but she knew they needed to work one way or another.

Luke’s car was nice, a shiny, little, silver thing, the backseat full of junk ranging from sheet music to empty food wrappers. Julie hopped into the front seat and Luke started the engine, pulling them out of the carpark and onto the road.

They didn’t say a word the whole time. Luke kept his eyes on the road, and though Julie tried to stare stoically out the window, she couldn’t help but look over at him often. She wished the universe had chosen an easier person to not want to be soulmates with. This was downright unfair.

She was fairly sure he knew she was looking at him.

After about ten minutes, Luke pulled into the carpark of a hotel. Julie peered out the window – perhaps they were just stopping for gas? – but found that the hotel was the only building in sight, which could only mean–

“This is where you live?” Julie asked him.

“Yeah,” he said shortly.

She looked again at the hotel as Luke unbuckled his seatbelt. It seemed nice enough, not run-down or derelict. A flashing neon sign outside read: NO VACANCIES.

“Does your family live here too?” she asked.

Luke paused, not looking at her. He didn’t end up replying at all. Instead, he got out the car and walked into the hotel, not looking back once. He returned five minutes later with an electric guitar slung over his back and a Tupperware box of brownies in his hand.

He shoved the guitar into the backseat, then clambered back into the driver’s seat and offered Julie one of the brownies. “Not trying to poison you,” he said when she hesitated. “My neighbour made them. She’s a really sweet old lady, she actually makes most of my food. I’m a terrible cook.”

Julie took a brownie, bit into it and let out a noise of delight. Luke began to smile, but abruptly stopped himself. Julie ignored the feeling of her heart being crushed. “You’re lucky she’s an amazing cook then.”

Luke nodded, and then they were on the road again. Silence descended upon them once more, apart from when Julie occasionally told him to turn down this street and make a U-turn at that opening. They arrived at Julie’s house and she led Luke down to the garage.

Julie had seldom been in her mother’s studio for the entire year following her death. It had taken immense willpower to even open the doors the first time she’d revisited it. Now, the studio was her safe haven. Maybe it meant something that she was willing to let Luke in – for the sake of her own sanity, she decided it meant nothing.

She watched his reaction as he took in the studio. His eyes danced over the grand piano in the centre of the room, the keyboard and drumkit shoved to the side, the synths stacked on top of amps in the corner. The finer details, like the butterfly decals that Julie had put up when she was seven, and the dartboard that had only been a recent addition. Luke went and sat down on the couch that Rose Molina had actually picked up from the side of the road one day. He grinned.

“This place is awesome,” Luke said. “Your mom is really into music, huh?”

Julie faltered, but decided not to lie. “Was. She passed away.”

Luke’s face fell. He swallowed and ducked his head. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. You didn’t know. Shall we get on with it?”

Somehow, in her mother’s studio, working with Luke was a thousand times easier. As they worked and ate the brownies, Julie felt herself relaxing. Luke wasn’t mentioning soulmates anymore and it was as if their brains were on the same wavelength. The chords fit perfectly underneath their fingers (his on the guitar, hers on the piano), the same lyrics were on the tips of their tongues. Within half an hour, they were up to the chorus, moving on to the third verse.

As Luke laughed at a distinctly unfunny comment she had made, Julie suddenly became aware that she was enjoying herself. She became aware that she and Luke were sat very close to each other on the piano stool, arms and legs pushed up against each other. She became aware that their faces were very close, that she could smell his cologne, that it seemed as if the blue of his eyes was all she could see again.

She wanted to kiss him.

“I think you should leave.”

Luke looked as if he’d been slapped, the smile wiped clean from his face. “But I thought–”

“Luke. Please just get out.”

He didn’t say anything else. Julie stayed where she was, eyes glued to the piano keys, listening to Luke gather his things behind her. She only knew he had gone from the sound of the garage door closing, and very distantly a car engine started, diminishing as it drove away from Julie’s house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't write songs, I know.  
> Once again - the love you're giving this fic has blown me away, so thank you so much!


	5. Alex - The First Date

Part 2 - The Truth Is Finally Breaking Through

It had been a stressful week to say the least.

It was Saturday again, and in the past seven days Alex had found and lost his soulmate, broken his no-argument streak with his parents spectacularly in a fight that had landed him three nights sleeping in Luke’s hotel room, fallen down a ridiculously steep staircase at school (which earned him a black eye), had two asthma attacks, snapped one of his nicest drumsticks, missed the due date for a very important history assignment, and to top it all off it rained _hard_ as he walked to the garage (lovingly called a studio) where he and the band rehearsed. By the time he arrived, not only was his mood dampened, but his clothes too.

“Alex,” Luke greeted as Alex entered the garage, shaking his wet hair like a dog. “You’re soaked, man.”

“Really,” Alex deadpanned. “I hadn’t noticed.”

“How?” Reggie asked. “Surely you felt the rain?”

At that, Alex exchanged a look with Luke, and the two of them turned their unimpressed gazes on Reggie. For a moment, he looked between the two of them bewilderedly but then said, “Oh. Right. Sarcasm, I get it.”

As they began rehearsing, Alex felt the week’s tension both ebbing out of him and building up. He felt on edge, uncomfortable, angry, hurt, and a thousand emotions that he couldn’t put a name to. To begin with, he didn’t realise what he was doing, but as Reggie and Luke started turning concerned stares on him he registered that he was practically wrestling his drumkit, no longer sticking to the tempo or the notation. He didn’t care – he beat the drums harder and faster, trying to release everything built up inside him, until all of a sudden he stopped.

Tired – that was another thing he felt.

“Alex, you alright?” Luke asked warily.

Alex swallowed. He wanted to say no. “Yeah. Why?”

“Is this about the whole soulmate thing?” Reggie asked.

Alex shrugged. “Partly. I guess. But there’s nothing I can do now.”

“At least your soulmate actually tried to talk to you,” Luke supplied, brooding. “He at least showed a little interest.”

Alex raised an eyebrow. “You might be able to change your soulmate’s opinion of you. I might not be able to find mine ever again.”

“That’s fair,” Luke conceded.

“I think you’re giving up too quickly, Alex,” Reggie said, ever the optimist. Alex envied him for his optimism sometimes; where Reggie saw everything as _glass half full_ , Alex couldn’t help but see everything as _glass half empty_ , or more accurately, _it doesn’t matter if the glass is empty or full because it’s perched precariously on the edge of a table and something could knock it over at any time, this is a serious problem, why is nobody moving the glass?_

“What would you suggest, Reg? That I go back to where we met every single day and hope this guy shows up again?”

Reggie beamed. “Yeah! That’s exactly what I was going to suggest.”

Alex rolled his eyes, but to his surprise, Luke said, “Actually, that might not be such a bad idea, Alex. Think about it – maybe this guy wants to try and find you again too, and because the only place you’ve ever seen each other is outside the Orpheum he’ll go back there as well. It could work!”

“It _could_ work,” Alex echoed quietly, thinking it over.

It was worth a shot.

They wrapped up their rehearsal an hour or so later. The sun had finally broken through the clouds, but there was still a light drizzle and a chill in the air as Alex trod the familiar path to the Orpheum. When he arrived, he stood awkwardly where his soulmate had knocked him to the ground, hands in his pockets, his heart beating a steady but nervous pulse.

The colour almost hurt to look at. Alex was used to the subdued, soft brown tones he usually saw, but now everything was flashing neon signs, people were wandering around in garish costumes, the lampposts were suddenly too bright, and mundane things like movie posters stung his eyes. He had to meet his soulmate, if only to see that sweet brown colour once again.

“I was hoping you’d come back here.”

Alex whirled around to see _him_ again – his soulmate was stood there, looking slightly sheepish but more happy, holding a cracked helmet and a skateboard in his restless hands. He hadn’t been able to get a good look at him before, but now Alex saw that his soulmate had soft, tawny skin, long dark brown hair almost the same shade as his eyes, and the most breath-taking smile Alex had ever seen. He felt his mouth go dry; he wasn’t sure how he’d got lucky enough to have a soulmate who looked so good in every sense of the word.

Alex fought the urge to run away again. Instead, he cleared his throat and tried for a smile. “Yeah. I… I was hoping you’d be here too.”

His soulmate beamed and Alex couldn’t help his own smile widening in return. His soulmate held his hand out and said, “My name’s Willie.”

Alex shook his hand. “Alex.”

Willie shifted his weight, leaning slightly to one side. “So, what brings you here? You come here a lot?”

“Yeah,” Alex replied. “I like it here.”

“Me too,” Willie said, grinning. “This is my favourite place to skate. I promise I don’t usually skate directly into people, I try to be careful. Sorry about that, by the way.”

“It’s no problem,” he told Willie. “I should have been watching my surroundings. I’m usually a lot more careful too.”

“That’s funny, huh? The one time neither of us are being careful we happen to meet each other. I guess that’s just the way soulmates work.”

He was sure Willie carried on talking, said something else, but Alex had stopped listening at _soulmates_. He had known they’d have to use the word at some point, and he loved the way it sounded when Willie said it, but he said it so confidently, so matter-of-factly. It stunned him. Shocked him. Made this even more real.

He realised he still hadn’t said anything.

“Sorry,” Willie said hurriedly. “I didn’t mean to just throw that out there. If you’re not–”

“No, no! Sorry,” Alex said, interrupting Willie. “It’s cool, I just… It’s cool. No worries. Soulmates. We’re soulmates. Cool.”

Willie grinned. “You’re wired a little tight, huh?”

Alex ducked his head. “Sorry. I’m bad at this.”

“Hey, don’t worry, man, I get it. The universe is placing a lot of pressure on us right now, it’s cool if you’re not totally comfortable right off the bat. You wanna go somewhere, get to know each other a little better? Maybe it’ll calm you down a bit. We don’t have to call it a date.”

Willie said it with a laugh, but in his expression Alex could see his nerves. At least it wasn’t just him feeling a little overwhelmed.

He gave a weak smile. “It’s a date.”

Willie’s smile was infectious – the moment his smile grew, Alex’s widened too. Willie offered his hand again, and with a surge of confidence, Alex took it. They left the Orpheum, and Willie talked his ear off as they made their way through the city; Alex could only watch and listen in awe as Willie rambled about this topic and that, voice and smile bright and excitable.

They wound up at a small hole-in-the-wall restaurant which seemed to sell anything imaginable.

“What do you want?” Willie asked. “I’ll pay. My treat.”

“Are you sure?” Alex asked, scanning the menu. It wasn’t as if anything was pricey, but he didn’t want to be annoying, making Willie pay. “I can pay you back.”

“Relax,” Willie told him gently. The soft tone took Alex by surprise. “Like I said, my treat. What are you having?”

Alex ordered a burger (no cheese) and Willie got a hotdog. Alex had had a thing about hotdogs ever since what he, Luke and Reggie had named The Incident. Now he couldn’t look at them without thinking of those dreadful few days.

“You’re glaring at my hotdog like it killed your entire family,” Willie said with a laugh.

“Sorry,” Alex said sheepishly, smiling. “I can’t stomach them. Once, me and my bandmates ate some bad hotdogs and got the worst food poisoning you could imagine. Now they activate Reggie’s fight or flight response and Luke will literally throw up if he so much as smells them.”

“You’re in a band? That’s awesome, what sort of stuff do you guys play?”

Alex was infinitely glad that was the detail Willie chose to focus on, rather than the fact that Alex brought up food poisoning while they were eating.

“Mainly our original songs. We’re a rock band – Sunset Curve.” He could hear Reggie’s voice in the back of his mind say ‘Tell your friends’.

Willie’s eyes widened. “Wait. There’s a band at my school that call themselves Sunset Curve. I’ve never heard them play though.”

Alex raised an eyebrow. “You go to Los Feliz?”

Willie nodded. “Yeah. I’m a senior.”

“I’m a junior,” Alex replied. “You must be thinking of my band. I wonder how I’ve never seen you until now… It’s not exactly a big school.”

“The universe works in strange ways, hotdog,” Willie said wisely. “There must’ve been a reason we hadn’t met until last week. Who are we to question it?”

Alex winced. “Please don’t try to make ‘hotdog’ a thing.”

“I’m going to make it a thing.”

It carried on like that, getting easier with every second. Alex felt himself relax in Willie’s presence, easy banter flowing back and forth between them, too-loud laughs and unsubtle touches shared more and more often. Throughout the next few days, Alex kept replaying every moment in his head, and though he saw Willie most days, he missed him when he wasn’t around.

That was what made it so difficult. Alex barely knew Willie – he shouldn’t have been missing him so much. That, he thought, was a sign of the gravity of soulmates, the hold they really had over everyone. He had so many questions: Was it supposed to feel like this? Was he allowed to be so infatuated so quickly? Would the butterflies he got in his stomach when he looked at Willie eventually settle or would it feel like this forever?

He considered talking to Luke about it, but Luke wasn’t exactly in the best of positions with his soulmate. Then he thought about Reggie, but his soulmate was platonic so it wasn’t quite the same. He was not going to talk to his parents; they didn’t want to know anything about Alex’s love life unless he was telling them he’d suddenly turned straight. He briefly entertained the thought of asking Willie himself about it, but he didn’t want to ruin the light-hearted thing they had going on.

Alex was leaving his maths class on Friday when he found his answer. Luke had hurried off to his extracurricular music class, eager to see Julie despite the fact that she still wasn’t showing any interest towards him, and Reggie had a study date with Flynn, so Alex had been left to pack up his equipment and head out alone.

He was the last to leave the room. As he left, he scanned the corridor for any sign of Willie, as had become a bad habit over the past week – after never having seen each other around school before, Alex kept running into Willie in recent days. He had to wonder if maybe Willie was doing it on purpose.

Alex was so caught up in looking for Willie that he walked slap-bang into somebody, knocking them to them floor.

“I’m so sorry!”

“Will you watch where you’re going?”

The two spoke at the exact same time, though Alex was a little taken aback by the person’s harsh tone. Still, he offered a hand to help them up – they ignored it and pulled themselves to their feet alone.

Alex recognised the person as they stood up and brushed themselves clean of dirt (not that their five seconds on the floor had made them particularly dirty) – it was Carrie Wilson, a girl in the year below him whose father was one of the most famous musicians in recent history and who had a band herself called Dirty Candi. Alex, though he wouldn’t admit it to his friends, adored Dirty Candi’s music.

Carrie glared up at Alex – he had been about to start fanboying over her band (he couldn’t help it!), but he saw that her eyes were red and her cheeks were tear-stained. The words died on his tongue, replaced by concern.

“Hey, are you alright? Did I really knock you down that hard?”

“It’s not that,” Carrie said, shoving past Alex into the empty maths classroom he’d just vacated. “Go away.”

He did not go away. “You’re Carrie, right? I’m Alex. I really like your music.”

Carrie looked him up and down, sniffling slightly. “Aren’t you in a band too? Sunrise Drift or something?”

“Sunset Curve,” he corrected. Carrie rolled her eyes. “Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it? Whatever’s got you so upset? I don’t mind.”

“Why do you care? Can’t you just leave me alone?”

“I could. But then you’d still be upset and I’d feel bad that I didn’t try and help.” He closed the classroom door and sat back down at his desk.

Carrie looked at him for a moment, then sighed and said, “If I tell you, will you leave me alone?”

Alex gave a small smile and nodded once. Carrie rolled her eyes again but perched herself in the chair beside him.

“How much experience do you have with soulmates?” she asked.

Alex blinked. To his surprise, it was a question he felt that maybe he could answer. He’d been wondering about soulmates himself for days, but now here was somebody else who was confused and suddenly he felt confident.

“Well, I only found mine about two weeks ago, and when we met I ran away from him. So… I’m not exactly an expert on the whole ‘first impressions’ thing.”

Carrie snorted. “Neither am I.”

“Oh? So you’ve found your soulmate?”

“Yeah,” she said quietly, nodding. “Years ago. And she hates me. The thing is… she’s my soulmate, but I’m not hers.”

Alex hadn’t even known that was a possibility. He inwardly said a thanks that he hadn’t known about it as it would have given him one more scenario to stress over before he met Willie.

“How do you know she hates you?”

“She superglued my locker shut,” Carrie said, deadpan. “And she left a note calling me a demon.”

“I’m sorry. That sucks.”

“It’s even worse because she recently found her soulmate and they’ve been joined at the hip. Every time I see them together she looks so happy and I hate that I’m not the one making her smile. And if we’re not soulmates then I don’t think I’ll ever get the chance.”

Carrie sniffed and a few teardrops fell onto the desk. Quickly, Alex rummaged in his pocket for a clean tissue and handed it to her. She gave him a watery smile as thanks, dabbing at her eyes gently.

“Do you mind if I ask who she is?” Alex ventured.

“You can’t tell anyone,” Carrie said sternly. Alex nodded. “Her name is Flynn. Do you know her?”

Alex recognised the name, immediately placed it. Flynn, Reggie’s soulmate. His _platonic_ soulmate. If she was lucky, maybe Carrie still had a chance.

“Yeah, I know her. Well, I know _of_ her. My friend Reggie is her soulmate.” Carrie huffed and crossed her arms. “But they’re platonic soulmates.”

The girl’s eyes widened. She grabbed Alex’s arm urgently. “Really? So if I can just get her to like me then I could still…?”

“Yeah,” he told her with a smile. “You could!”

And suddenly Carrie was hugging Alex with a ferocity he only usually experienced when Luke was in an extremely good mood (like after a performance; Luke had time for hugs and nothing else after Sunset Curve played a set). After a moment, he hugged her back, but she pulled away quickly.

“Not a word of this to anybody, especially not Flynn or her soulmate, okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” Alex assured her. “So… you’ve had a soulmate for years, yeah?”

Carrie shrugged. “Yes. Not in the conventional sense. Obviously.”

Alex thought for a moment, a hundred questions queued up in his mind, but asked them all in one go, saying, “Does it ever get any easier?”

Alex couldn’t have worded his question more vaguely, but Carrie seemed to understand. Her expression softened and she gently laid a hand on Alex’s arm.

“Never.”

That was all he had needed to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I let Alex be a little happier in this chapter. As a treat.


	6. Reggie - The Realisation

Part 2 - The Truth Is Finally Breaking Through

“Oh, and her _clothes_ today. What was she thinking?! Her pink jacket with the little badges on would have matched so much nicer than the denim one.”

Reggie had parted ways with Luke and Alex and hurried off after maths, his last lesson of the day, because he and Flynn had arranged a study date. So far, all it had included was sitting in the library, opening a biology textbook between the two of them, and then Flynn had launched into a forty-five-minute-long spiel about the person she had dubbed her ‘Arch Nemesis’.

Carrie Wilson, or as Reggie would now be referring to her, Flynn’s Absolutely Gigantic and Undeniable Crush.

Since the rant began, Reggie hadn’t been able to get a word in edgeways as Flynn went on and on about Carrie. Eventually, she stopped to take a drink of water, so Reggie seized his chance.

“I’m not sure you hate this girl as much as you’re claiming,” he said.

Flynn choked on her water momentarily, then looked at Reggie, aghast.

“Have you been listening to a word I’ve said?”

“Yep! I wrote some of it down, too.”

He picked up his notepad, upon which he’d scrawled the title _An Incomplete List of Things Flynn Has Said Since We Sat Down That Heavily Imply She’s Head Over Heels for Carrie Wilson_. Underneath the title, the list spanned two pages.

Flynn made a grab for it, but Reggie held it aloft, out of her way.

“Uh-uh,” he teased, lifting the notepad higher. Flynn huffed and sat back on her chair.

“I never said anything nice about her,” Flynn said heatedly.

“Right,” Reggie said mockingly. “Then you won’t mind if I read off a few of my favourite ‘insults’ you’ve used.”

“No, don’t–”

“Number six: you claimed that she smelled like ‘stupid unicorns and glitter and rainbows’. Number nineteen: according to you, she has ‘the voice of a stupid angel’. And coming in at number thirty-one: ‘her face is so stupidly cute, I want to punch it’. Flynn, adding ‘stupid’ before a compliment doesn’t make it an insult.”

Flynn made an indignant noise, then said, “I said I wanted to punch her! How is that not an insult?”

“Because you wanted to punch her _for being cute_ ,” Reggie countered.

Flynn looked as if she were about to say something, but then sighed dramatically and flopped down onto the table. She groaned loudly and said something Reggie couldn’t hear, mainly because the words were delivered to their biology textbook.

“What was that?” he asked.

Flynn sat up abruptly and said, “Fine! Maybe I do like her a little bit. I don’t know.”

“I do.”

“You’re not helping.”

“Sorry,” Reggie said. He looked to Flynn, who looked utterly defeated, and realised that right now he wasn’t meant to be the jokey best friend, he was meant to be the perfect soulmate who could listen and understand. “What can I do? Or what can I say?”

“Have you ever… I don’t know. Have you ever found guys cute?”

Reggie thought for a moment. His mind immediately drifted to something that had happened almost a year ago while he and the band were rehearsing for a gig. Luke had claimed he had chemistry with everyone he sang with and had proved it by practically serenading Reggie. It had made Reggie’s mind race – he hadn’t thought then, nor did he think now, that he liked Luke as anything more than a friend, but the thoughts he’d had at that moment had been anything but heterosexual.

Then there had been the time at the beach over the summer. Alex had asked Reggie to put sunscreen on his back because he couldn’t reach and Alex, being Alex, was paranoid about sunburn. Reggie had obliged, like any good friend would, but felt like a distinctly bad friend when rubbing his hands all over Alex’s back and… well, enjoying it. Again, he saw Alex as a friend and a friend only, but there was no denying what he’d thought and felt at that moment.

Oh. And he had kissed a guy before, just once. It hadn’t been Luke or Alex – in fact, he hadn’t even met either of them yet. While he was still in middle school, Reggie had gone to a sleepover at his friend’s house. The two of them, as thirteen-year-olds just hitting puberty were wont to do, had been talking about girls when his friend suddenly revealed that maybe he thought boys were more attractive than girls. Reggie had been able to see where he was coming from – months later, the two of them decided to kiss, just to try it out. It had been Reggie’s first kiss.

“Yeah,” he said to Flynn. “Yeah, definitely.”

“Just guys?”

He scoffed. “No. No way. I like girls.”

Flynn raised an eyebrow. “So what do you consider yourself?”

Reggie opened his mouth to automatically respond that he was straight, but then closed it. How could he say he was straight after all that?

“I’ve never really thought about it,” he admitted. “I mean… I know I like girls, I guess I like guys. I don’t know, I’m not really clued in on all this stuff, I thought there was only gay and straight. I don’t know a lot about it.”

“I can help with that,” Flynn said, then she pulled out her phone and tapped away at the screen.

A moment later she turned it to Reggie. It displayed a load of colourful flags; Reggie recalled maybe seeing them before, when everything had been brown, the colour of Flynn’s eyes. They were a lot brighter now, varying colours in all different shades. He recognised a blue, pink, and white one – the same one was hanging in Luke’s hotel room, right above his bed. Reggie had never asked what it meant.

“I’m not trying to figure out your sexuality for you,” Flynn said, scrolling down. “But I think you should look up bisexuality and pansexuality. They’re very similar, really. Bisexuality is an attraction to more than one gender, and pansexuality is more like when gender is a non-factor. There’s a lot of overlap, but they’re not exactly the same.”

She had paused on two flags. One was striped with pink, purple, and blue, and the other was pink, yellow, and a lighter blue. Reggie pointed at the pink, purple, and blue one.

“I like these colours,” he said. “Which one is this?”

Flynn gave him a look as if to say _Are you really deciding your sexuality based on which flag you like more?_ but she only said, “That’s the bi flag.”

Reggie nodded. “I’ll think about it more later. What are you thinking? About your sexuality, this thing with Carrie?”

Flynn thought for a moment, then scrolled up and pointed at a flag with multiple shades of pink and orange.

“I’m not totally sure yet, but I think I’m a lesbian. I think I just like girls. But… I don’t know.”

Flynn’s head drooped disappointedly, and Reggie put a gentle hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay that you don’t know. Your sexuality clearly isn’t something you’re born knowing – I mean, I only just worked out I like dudes. I think it’s alright for you to take as much time as you need to figure yourself out.”

At that, Flynn’s head lifted a little bit and she offered a small smile. “Thank you, Reggie. See, this is why you’re my soulmate.”

She reached over and wrapped him in a tight hug.

“Not a word of this to anyone, especially not Carrie,” Flynn said into his shoulder. “Okay?”

“Of course,” Reggie told her. “I won’t tell a soul.”

Reggie kept his promise – he wasn’t sure he could ever break a promise to Flynn – but the entire conversation was on his mind for days afterwards.

There was Flynn’s crush on Carrie; could that work alright if they weren’t soulmates? How heart-breaking would it be for Flynn if Carrie’s soulmate were somebody else and their connection was romantic?

Then there was his own sexuality; when he had got home that day, he had headed straight upstairs and done more research about sexuality in two hours than he’d done about anything school-related in the past two years. Once he was satisfied that he had enough information, he went onto Amazon and ordered himself a bisexual pride badge to pin to his favourite leather jacket.

He felt a strange but welcome feeling of satisfaction – he had only been questioning his sexuality for a few hours, but the more he looked into bisexuality the more he thought to himself _oh, there you are!_ It felt less like a realisation, more like coming home after a long holiday. Familiar. Right.

After he had bought the badge, he thought for a moment. He wondered if he should tell Alex and Luke what he’d found out about himself. He knew they’d be accepting – after all, they both had their own flags to fly too. He got as far as picking up his phone and typing out a message, but then decided he would rather have told them face to face.

So that was what he did.

That Saturday, Sunset Curve met at the usual time and the usual place for band practise. Reggie didn’t ordinarily feel nervous, and he knew there was nothing to be nervous about now, but he couldn’t stop himself from bouncing on the balls of his feet and picking tunelessly at his guitar strings as he waited for the others to arrive.

Luke and Alex arrived together, which happened sometimes and usually meant that for whatever reason Alex had stayed the night at Luke’s hotel. The reason was usually a fight with his parents.

“Hey man,” Luke said to Reggie when they finally arrived. “How’re you doing?”

Reggie looked between the two of them. He knew that he should have said he was alright, asked how the both of them were, double-checked that Alex was doing okay and asked whether he’d had to stay at Luke’s or they’d simply happened to arrive together. His big announcement could have waited until a more suitable moment.

Reggie’s mouth did not co-operate with his brain.

“I’m bisexual,” he blurted.

Alex and Luke blinked, looked to each other, then smiled back at Reggie.

“We know, man,” Alex said, clapping him on the shoulder.

It was Reggie’s turn to be taken by surprise. “You do? How? I didn’t even know!”

Luke chuckled, shaking his head fondly. “You wear flannels.”

Reggie looked down and realised that he was indeed wearing one of the many flannels he owned. He looked back up at his friends and gave them a wide smile.

And that was that.

Practise went smoother than it had in weeks. They were readying their set for the Fall Showcase, which would start with one of Reggie’s personal favourite songs, Now or Never. The three of them knew that there would be a lot of opportunity stemming from this performance and they had to do well. Reggie was glad to see their songs were finally coming together.

“Hey,” Alex said as they packed up at the end of their rehearsal. He had a mighty blush on his cheeks, looking equal parts nervous and excited. “I was thinking. Do you think I should invite Willie to come and watch us play? I mean, he’ll probably be going anyway because it’s a school thing, but if I invite him does that turn it into a date?”

“Do you _want_ to turn it into a date?” Luke asked.

“Of course he does,” Reggie said, “look at him! He’s a mess just thinking about it.”

Alex furrowed his brows and his blush deepened, irritated and embarrassed. “That’s not… Okay. Yes, I do want to make it a date. I want him to see me doing something I enjoy, you know, I want to share that with him.”

“Aw,” Reggie said. “That’s sweet. You totally should. Hey, we should all invite our soulmates to come watch us, then we can all hang out together. All six of us.”

Luke frowned. “If I try and invite Julie she might slap me.”

“Things still not settled between you two?” Alex asked.

Luke shook his head. “No. We’ve barely said a word to each other in the last, like, four music lessons, which means we’ve made no progress on our duet. It’s going to be so embarrassing if we end up with nothing to perform on the night of the showcase.”

“What about the one we helped you write?” Reggie asked. “We spent hours on that, it was good.”

Luke snorted. “Yeah, look what she did to it.”

He began rummaging in his rucksack, presumably for his song-writing book, the one he took everywhere with him. The minutes dragged by, and Luke kept searching. Soon he began muttering to himself. Reggie exchanged a concerned look with Alex.

“No, no, no!” Luke shouted, tipping the contents of his bag out onto the studio’s floor. “I can’t find it! Help me, you know what song is in there. I can’t rewrite it.”

Reggie did know. He knew every song in that book off by heart, but he knew which song Luke was talking about now. With Alex, he joined Luke on the floor, picking through unused textbooks and empty candy wrappers. There was no sign on the songbook amongst any of it.

“Okay, don’t panic,” Alex said, but it was a moot point because Luke was clearly already panicking. “When did you last use it?”

Luke scrubbed a hand over his face. “Not recently. I’ve been swamped with homework and stuff, so I haven’t written anything at home, then I’ve been working on our set during music lessons, so it must have been… when I went to Julie’s house.”

“You went to Julie’s _house_?!” Reggie exclaimed. He looked to Alex who looked equally bewildered; Reggie was glad that it wasn’t just him hearing this for the first time.

“Yeah, but that’s not really important right now,” Luke told him. “It didn’t go well, and I had to leave quickly, and I must have left it there.”

“She didn’t return it to you?” Alex asked. Luke shook his head.

“That’s pretty rude,” Reggie commented.

“Whether or not she’s rude isn’t what I’m worried about,” Luke said angrily. “What if she’s been through it? I wouldn’t care, but _you know what song is in there_! I can’t have her reading it. If she really doesn’t want anything to do with me then she doesn’t get to see that song.”

Sunset Curve had only played this particular one of Luke’s songs a handful of times. Reggie knew it was difficult for him to play, to even get the words out, but once in a while he would ask them if they could rehearse it. He’d say, ‘Just in case’ or ‘I want to change part of the chorus’ or ‘We don’t have anything else to practise’. Reggie knew that neither him nor Alex required an excuse from Luke when it came to playing this song – he could have just asked and they would say yes every time – but he also knew Luke felt more comfortable if he hid his emotions slightly.

After all, he bore so many of his emotions in the lyrics of that song that it was only right to let him keep a few hidden away.

“Ask her for it when you next see her,” Reggie suggested. “She may not want to be soulmates, but I don’t think she’d steal your belongings.”

“What am I meant to say?”

“It doesn’t have to be complicated,” Alex told him. “Just say, ‘Do you have my songbook?’ or ‘Can I have it back?’. She doesn’t need to know what’s in there.”

Luke scowled. “And what if she’s already looked?”

Alex shrugged. “Then she’s already looked, and there’s nothing you can do about it. Maybe it’ll work in your favour – she might see a new side to you. A man in touch with his emotions.”

“Not helpful, Alex.”

“Soulmates are so weird,” Reggie said abruptly. Alex and Luke looked to him, perplexed. He supposed it hadn’t been strictly on-topic. “I mean, there’s you and Julie, who just can’t get yourselves together; then there’s Alex and Willie, and Willie still wants him for whatever reason even though Alex totally freaked the first time they met; then there’s me and Flynn, and we’re not even romantic soulmates, and Flynn helped me figure out I’m bi, and I helped her come to terms with her crush on… um… someone. It’s just weird, right?”

“I don’t like how you described Julie and me,” Luke said.

“I don’t like what you implied about me and Willie,” Alex added.

They were both scowling at him.

Reggie gave a nervous laugh. “Soulmates, am I right?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is essentially me playing a game of How Hard Can I Project Onto Both Flynn and Reggie?


	7. Julie - The Truth

Part 3 - Love Me As I Am

Julie couldn’t get Luke and his songbook out of her mind.

When she had unceremoniously kicked him out of her studio, he had hurried out so quickly that he had left his songbook behind, resting open on the piano. Julie had picked it up and figured that she would simply return it to him next music lesson or if she happened to see him again before that. But she hadn’t had the self-restraint not to at least take a peek at the other songs.

She had known Luke was a good songwriter – he had proved it to her in the studio that day – but some of his songs were next-level. Music seemed as much a part of Luke as his blood and bones, and it was evident in every lyric and melody he messily scribbled down in the notepad that he poured a part of his soul into every song he wrote. Music clearly meant something to Luke; Julie couldn’t help but be reminded how much music had meant to her mother. How much it meant to Julie herself.

She had read every song up until the blank pages started appearing. She flicked through the whole book though, just in case he’d written something further back – and he had. As Julie neared the back of the book, it fell naturally open to a certain page in her hands like someone had continually revisited it and the book knew where to go. The song had multiple titles, crossed out and rewritten and smudged, but the most recent was _Unsaid Emily_.

Julie read it and broke. She didn’t know who Emily was, but clearly Luke cared for her a great deal. His lyrics were of love and loss and regret and pride, raw emotion fed into every line. Julie felt tears prick her eyes as she read the song. It was so very Luke.

She wondered if maybe this Emily girl was some ex of Luke’s. Maybe, Julie thought, she didn’t have to worry about Luke wanting to be soulmates if there was this girl he could perhaps find again.

The thought filled her with a sadness so nauseating and complete that she closed the book and hid it away underneath one of the couch cushions.

Hence, she hadn’t been able to get Luke and his songbook out of her mind.

Eventually, after weeks of avoiding Luke and barely talking during their music sessions, she plucked up the courage to give him the book back. She didn’t want to; something in her wanted to hoard Luke’s emotions, keep this stripped, raw, real version of him with her at all times. But she knew that was unfair, she knew that would essentially be stealing, so one Monday, just one week before the Fall Showcase, she brought the book to school and set out to find Luke.

She found him easily enough. He was in the music corridor, heading into a classroom with two other guys Julie didn’t recognise. He was just about to go inside.

“Luke,” Julie called, “wait a moment!”

Luke looked over to Julie, clearly confused, then turned to the guys beside him and said something Julie couldn’t hear. One of the boys, a tall blond one, said something that Julie lip-read and appeared to be, “Is that Julie?”

Luke nodded.

“Hi Julie,” called the other boy, a cheery-looking dark-haired lad. He gave her an excited wave. The blond boy hit his arm and dragged him inside the classroom as Luke made his way over.

Julie plucked the book out of her bag. “Sorry. You left this at mine and I kept forgetting to return it to you.”

Luke took the book, relief obvious on his face. “Thanks. Did you… did you, um, read any of it?”

Julie shifted uneasily. She wasn’t sure whether or not to tell the truth. After the way she had treated Luke she knew she didn’t deserve to see the part of him he kept locked away in his music and it had been wrong of her to look. To keep him happy, she should have lied.

But Luke deserved the truth.

“Yeah,” she admitted. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have. It was wrong of me.”

Luke looked unhappy but unsurprised. He shook his head, avoiding Julie’s eye. “It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. I’ve got to get to class.”

He turned on his heel and made as if to head into his classroom.

“Luke,” Julie called after him. He stopped and turned to face her, but didn’t walk any closer. She gulped, but then said, “Who’s Emily?”

Luke’s expression shifted; he looked equal parts furious and distraught. “You read that one?”

“Who is she?” Julie asked, avoiding the question.

“Nobody. Why do you care? It’s not like you’ve been bothered about knowing anything about me in the past.”

“Is she another girl?”

Luke’s expression seemed to harden and soften at the same time. “No. It’s not like that. There’s never been any other girl at all. I was always waiting for my soulmate. I kind of hoped she’d be waiting for me too.”

And he left.

Later that night, Julie was staring at her maths homework. She wasn’t actually doing any of the questions, she couldn’t focus her mind properly. Her thoughts were addled and swimming and nothing felt the same as it had been just a few weeks ago.

She wanted to talk to Luke.

She wanted to call him her soulmate.

“Hey,” said Julie’s father, entering the kitchen and seeing her sat at the table. “Are you doing homework? Anything I can help you with?”

“Yeah,” Julie said, taking off her reading glasses and setting them down. “But… it’s not to do with the homework.”

Ray raised his eyebrows, but he sat across from Julie, rolling up his sleeves. “Sure. What’s on your mind?”

Julie sighed. She might as well say everything.

“I’ve been thinking about Luke and this whole soulmate situation. You know how ever since mom died I haven’t wanted a soulmate. But Luke is really cool. He’s so nice and he’s brilliant at music and he’s funny and kind and he’s… I hate to say it but it’s like he’s made for me. He told me today that he’d always been waiting for his soulmate. And I feel so guilty because I’ve been nothing but unkind to him because I was so desperate not to feel anything, but I’ve spent so much time with him and I’ve got to know him better and now I don’t know what I want. I think I want to be soulmates. But I don’t know if he’ll have me after I’ve been so awful. I just don’t know what to do.”

After Julie finished, Ray was silent for a time. Julie hoped she was imagining the tears in his eyes. A minute or so later, he seemed to find his voice.

“I’m sorry, honey,” he said, “I really don’t know what to say. I think this has to come from you.”

Julie frowned. “You’ve got nothing?”

Ray shook his head. “It’s a lot to take in. You’re taking a big step. I’m still trying to process your change of heart. It’s… I don’t know. I’m proud of you, Julie.”

She smiled, but pride didn’t help her reach a decision.

Then, a voice too loud for its tiny owner and the silence spoke up from behind.

“Why don’t you just tell him the truth?” said Carlos, Julie’s little brother. “I mean, if he’s always wanted a soulmate then he’ll let you explain yourself, right? If you tell him why you don’t like the universe and why you didn’t want a soulmate then he might forgive you, or at least understand. If he’s as nice as you say then he’ll at least give you a chance. And if it doesn’t work out you can just use it as another excuse to not like the universe.”

Julie and Ray shared a look of surprise.

“That’s actually really good advice, Carlos,” Julie said, “thank you.”

“Yeah. When did you get so wise?” asked Ray.

Carlos folded his arms smugly. “I’ve always been wise, you’ve just never been wise enough to see it.”

Julie shook her head fondly, then stood up and walked out of the kitchen, ruffling Carlos’s hair on the way out. “Seriously, Carlos. Thank you.”

A few days later, on Thursday, Julie arrived to music before Luke did, which hardly ever happened. It was alright, she thought, because it gave her some time to run over what she was going to say to him before he got there. She was going to take Carlos’s advice. She was going to be totally and completely honest with Luke.

About five minutes after Julie got there, Luke walked into the music room they were using. He gave her a tight smile, but she returned it brightly. It seemed to take him by surprise, but Julie noticed that his smile widened the tiniest bit. She took that as a good sign.

“Hi Luke,” she said, trying not to sound breathless. “How are you?”

“I’m alright,” he replied, seeming confused. Julie understood – this was probably the happiest he had ever seen her. “You seem like you’re in a good mood.”

“I am,” she said earnestly. “But I’m also a little nervous. Can you sit down? There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

Still looking utterly bewildered, Luke nodded and sat down on the chair next to Julie’s. She smiled at him – he smiled back.

God, she loved the blue of his eyes.

“In a few weeks, it will have been one year since my mom died.” Luke opened his mouth to say something but Julie shook her head – if he interrupted her now she might not be able to carry on. “She and my dad were soulmates. It hurt losing her, but what hurt even more was seeing how crushed my dad was. He’s never been with anyone else I don’t think he ever will be. But he’ll never have his soulmate back and he’ll never see colours again.

“When my mom died I swore to myself that when I found my soulmate I wouldn’t be with him. No matter who he was, no matter how much I liked him, I would not be with him. I didn’t want to open myself up to that kind of pain and vulnerability. I didn’t need any more grief in my life.

“But… since I met you I’ve been questioning that. Is it really the way forward? Is it worth giving up the other half of my soul just to spite the universe? Luke, I think you’re amazing. I know I haven’t been nice to you at all, but I was scared. That’s not an excuse and I don’t expect you to forgive me, it’s just the truth. I was scared to be your soulmate.

“I don’t think I need to be scared anymore. I don’t think my mom would want me to give up this incredible opportunity. I think I want my soulmate. I’m sorry it took me so long to realise. I completely understand if you don’t want me anymore, but I hope you know that every time I hurt you it hurt me too. Do you think you can give me another chance?”

She was crying – when had she started crying? Luke was holding her hand – when had he taken her hand? Oh, and Luke was crying too – when had _he_ started crying?

“You don’t need to apologise for anything, Julie,” he said gently. “I get it. I… Can I tell you something too?”

Julie nodded. She didn’t think she had any words left in her.

“I live in a hotel because about seven months ago I got in a huge fight with my mom. She’s never liked the thought of me being in a rock band – she thinks I’ll get into dangerous situations, drink and drugs and things like that. We had a lot of fights, but after the worst one I packed my bags and left. I haven’t been back home since.”

Julie stroked her thumb in gentle, comforting circles on the back of Luke’s hand. He took a deep breath.

“That song – Unsaid Emily – it was about my mother.”

 _Oh_. That made sense. Luke felt guilty about leaving his mother, he still loved her and he wanted to go back, but–

“I was afraid,” Luke said. “Just like you were about being with me, I was afraid to go back home and apologise to my mom. I really want to, you know. I miss her. And I think I’m ready now – I’m going to go home after the showcase and I’m going to play her the song. I haven’t told the guys yet, but I think it’s fair for me to tell you that; soulmates are meant to share things, right?”

Julie smiled and gave a watery laugh when she realised he had referred to them as soulmates. Hardly registering what she was doing, Julie lurched forward and pulled Luke into a tight hug. She buried her face in his neck and felt him do the same – he smelled of guitar strings and wood and home.

By the end of the music lesson, they had restarted and finished their song for the Fall Showcase. Luke titled it, messily scribbling down the words ‘Perfect Harmony’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm annoyed that I didn't include Carlos more. He's the best little brother in the entire world.  
> Julie has one more (extremely short) chapter left!


	8. Alex - The Kiss

Part 3 - Love Me As I Am

Alex was beginning to regret everything.

It was the night of the Fall Showcase and Alex was staring at himself in his bedroom mirror. He felt like he hardly recognised himself – it wasn’t that he looked different, he just felt so… changed. After the past month or so, _everything_ felt changed, and the Fall Showcase felt like it marked the before and after.

Alex had never coped well with change and he didn’t think he ever would.

He took in his appearance. The fitted black trousers, the suave pink suit jacket, the neatly ironed dress shirt, the flower in his lapel pocket that Willie had insisted would complement his eyes (and truth be told, if anyone was an expert on Alex’s eyes, it had to be Willie). He looked confident, he looked professional, but inside he was crumbling.

What really sucked was that he had been doing so well. He hadn’t felt this anxious in weeks. And suddenly it felt as if all that progress might have been for nothing.

A week or so ago he had been hanging out at Willie’s house. It was something the two of them had started doing in recent weeks. Willie’s adoptive father worked a lot and was rarely home, so they could hang out, just the two of them, uninterrupted. And it was much safer than going to Alex’s house.

They had been lounged on the sofa, Alex with his head resting comfortably on Willie’s lap, watching a Disney movie that Alex hadn’t been paying much attention to. When the movie’s credits started rolling, Alex looked up at Willie and asked, “Are you coming to watch the Fall Showcase?”

Willie had grinned. “Of course I am. I hear the drummer for Sunset Curve is pretty cute.”

Alex had blushed profusely, which earned a laugh from Willie.

“I was wondering,” he said, blushing brighter by the second, “would you like to go as my boyfriend? Like, we make it a date?”

Willie’s smile had softened and he had brushed a stray hair out of Alex’s eyes. “I’d love to.”

And that had been that, Alex had thought.

Only here he was now, having a crisis in his bedroom just five minutes before Willie was due to pick him up and take him to school for the Showcase. He knew he was being silly, that the Showcase wouldn’t be make or break for his relationship with Willie, but it felt like he was putting himself out there. By inviting Willie to watch instead of relying on the fact he’d be there, Alex felt like he was trying to show Willie a part of himself, that now he was doing this _for_ Willie, at least in part. Maybe that was true, but it was still a lot of pressure.

Alex wasn’t sure he could do this anymore.

He picked up his phone to call Luke and cancel, but just as he was about to open Luke’s contact, he heard a knock at the door downstairs.

He threw his phone to his bed and dashed downstairs, but heard the door open before he could get there.

“Yes?” came his father’s voice.

“Hi,” said Willie, sounding surprised. “You must be Alex’s dad. My name is Willie.”

Alex practically fell to the bottom and the staircase and hurtled down the hallway. He arrived by the door, out of breath, to see Willie on the doorstep wearing a suit (well, almost a suit. He was wearing shorts and bright socks with a tailcoat, but it was close) and looking a little nervous as Alex’s father stared down at him.

Willie gave him a wave. “Hi Alex.”

“Alexander,” said Alex’s father, rounding on him. “Is this a new friend of yours?”

Alex had told Willie that his parents didn’t yet know he’d found his soulmate and he knew Willie understood his circumstances, but having it stated so plainly that his father didn’t know who Willie was stung Alex. Nervous as he was at that moment, Alex wanted him to know – he didn’t care if he was happy about it or not.

In his peripheral vision, Alex saw his mother appear in the kitchen doorway, watching the scene unfold. He looked between his parents, then locked eyes with Willie whose face was unreadable.

“He’s my soulmate,” Alex said. His voice was loud but it shook slightly. “Mom, dad, this is Willie and he is my soulmate. And I really, really, really like him.”

Nobody spoke. After a moment, Alex’s father moved away from the door, expression stony. Alex didn’t look at him as he joined Alex’s mother in the kitchen doorway – he only had eyes for Willie.

“Can I talk to you for a moment?” Alex said.

Willie nodded. The two of them stepped outside the house, facing each other on Alex’s driveway. Alex was dimly aware that his hands were fidgeting and nervous, tapping an uneven beat against his sides. Willie took both his hands in his and they stilled quickly.

“You look amazing,” Willie said quietly.

“So do you,” Alex breathed. Willie beamed and Alex broke. He couldn’t help it – he began to cry, ever so softly, tears quickly spilling down his cheeks.

Willie reacted instantly. He released Alex’s hands and pulled him into a hug, hands planted firmly on Alex’s back, stroking it soothingly. Alex buried his face in Willie’s neck, in his long hair, and held him with equal force. Absently, he felt bad that he was getting Willie’s suit wet with his tears.

“Hey,” Willie said gently. “What’s brought this on? Are you nervous about your performance?”

Alex sniffled. “Sort of. I’m worried because you’re going to be there and… I so want you to enjoy yourself tonight, Willie. I meant what I said to my parents – I really, really, really like you. And it feels like tonight means something, you know? I want to share this thing that I love with you, and for some reason I’m terrified of it. It just feels so… I don’t know. Intimate? I’m not making any sense, am I?”

Willie moved back a little to look Alex in the eye. “It makes perfect sense. I get it, Alex. If you can’t do this tonight, we can crash at mine. If you want to do it, then we’ll go. If you think it’d be easier without me there, I’ll drop you off and head back home. We’ll go with whatever you want, Alex.” He took Alex’s hands in his again. “I’d do anything for you.”

Alex hugged him again, even fiercer and tighter than before. When he pulled back, he said, “Let’s get going. Don’t want to be late.”

Willie laced his fingers with Alex and began to lead him to his car, but a voice behind them called, “Boys.”

Alex turned to see his parents in the doorway, looking at him and his boyfriend. Both of their expressions were unreadable – the total neutrality either meant they really were indifferent or they were extremely angry.

Monotonously, Alex’s father said, “After the Showcase the two of you will come back here. I’d like to have a chat with you, young man.” He waggled a finger at Willie, who nodded once.

“Enjoy your night, Alexander,” said Alex’s mother. She shut the door without waiting for a response.

“Do you think they’re angry?” Willie asked.

Alex shrugged. “I have no idea. Probably. I guess we’ll find out later.”

In the car, Willie sang along to the radio for the entire journey. He wasn’t half bad, Alex thought, admiring his boyfriend as he felt the nerves about the night dissipating. When they arrived at school, Willie gave him one last hug and said, “You’ll be amazing, hotdog,” before hurrying off to his seat while Alex went backstage.

Sunset Curve were set to play first. Alex found Luke and Reggie already setting up their instruments.

“Dude, where’ve you been?” Luke asked. “We go on in two minutes, we were almost ready to find a replacement drummer!”

“I’ll explain later,” Alex said breezily. “Right now we’ve just got to get out there and play our best. Right?”

“Are you sure we can’t fit Home Is Where My Horse Is into our set anywhere?” Reggie asked. “I think it could go nicely after Long Week–”

“No,” said Alex and Luke simultaneously.

Alex adored the feeling of the lights rising on him and his friends as they took to the stage. The crowd, made up of the student body, the faculty, family members, record execs, and who knew else, cheered wildly before the band had even played a note. Alex counted them in (“One, two, three!”) and Luke began singing the opening to Now or Never.

Alex played the song from muscle memory, hardly looking at his drumkit – his eyes scanned the crowd for one face in particular, but it was hard to make out anyone. Alex only found Willie, sat two rows from the front, by the time he reached his solo.

“ _We ain’t searching for tomorrow, ‘cause we got all we need today_.”

He delivered his lines directly to Willie, looking him in the eye, sharing his ecstatic smile. Willie was clapping along and stamping his feet, grinning wondrously, clearly enjoying himself. It gave Alex all the confidence he needed and made him wonder _How was I ever worried about any of this?_

Fifteen minutes later, Reggie struck the final chord of Crooked Teeth and the boys took their bows. Alex looked to Willie who gave him an excited thumbs up and he felt himself smile so much it hurt.

After the band had packed their instruments away and congratulated each other, Alex bade them farewell and excuse-me’d his way through the audience to get to his seat beside Willie. Immediately, Willie clapped Alex on the back and said, “That was incredible.”

Alex smiled brightly. “It was for you.”

It was time for the music department to showcase what they’d been working on, so Alex and Willie quieted down and sat back to watch. The groups were largely very good, if occasionally a little under-rehearsed. The final pair, however, managed to steal the show.

Luke and Julie took to the stage, Julie sat at the piano, Luke beside her playing his guitar, and sang their own beautiful original song. Luke looked happy – finally – and he was looking at Julie with an adoration Alex had hardly ever seen before. Julie, thankfully, was sharing his expression, gazing fondly into his eyes as she sang. Their song was titled Perfect Harmony, and Alex thought it was exactly that: perfect.

He was glad his friend got the ending he deserved.

After Julie and Luke’s performance finished, the interval was announced. Alex and Willie followed the rest of the crowd to another hall which was providing refreshments.

“I meant it, Alex,” Willie said. “That was… you were amazing. Your energy, your music, it was like I could really feel it in my soul. It was beautiful.”

Alex looked to him, adrenaline and love coursing through every fibre of him. He felt like he was on top of the world, running on the high of the performance, of sharing this whole thing with Willie. Willie, who was Alex’s idea of perfection, his boyfriend, his soulmate.

Without stopping to think, Alex grabbed Willie’s hand, pulled him out of the crowd to the edge of the room, and kissed him. It didn’t last long because Alex realised what he had done, panicked, and pulled away before Willie even got the chance to respond.

It was their first kiss.

“I’m so sorry,” Alex said hurriedly, “I should have asked, I should have checked that was okay, I shouldn’t have just done it. Oh God, I’m so–”

“Alex,” Willie said on a laugh, stepping forward. “It was okay.”

Alex blinked. “It was? Really?”

“Of course! It was more than okay.”

Alex felt the beginnings of a small smile starting to form on his face. “How much more than okay?”

Willie grinned. “Like, really okay. Super okay. Extremely okay.”

“Would it be extremely okay if I did it again?” Alex asked, summoning every ounce of courage he had and ignoring the blush it brought to his face.

“It would,” Willie said.

Alex leaned down and kissed him again. It was hesitant at first, but he quickly felt comfortable. This, he thought, was exactly how it was supposed to be. Willie, his soulmate, cared about him exactly the same way Alex did. He understood him, and he had said himself that he would do anything for Alex. Alex knew then and there that the reverse was true too – he would do anything for Willie, anything at all.

He pulled away and laughed. “Yeah,” he whispered, tucking Willie’s hair behind his ear. “This _is_ extremely okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Willex: *exists*  
> Me: Make Them Hug.
> 
> I've read and reread this chapter so many times that I'm pretty sure I could recite it off by heart. It's Alex's last chapter too, so we've reached the end of his journey. I actually really liked how this came out.
> 
> Also, I hit 100 followers on my Tumblr (@gaylebcovington) so I posted a Missing Scene fic there, check that out if you want!


	9. Reggie - Breaking Point

Part 3 - Love Me As I Am

The night of the Fall Showcase had finally arrived and Reggie had never felt better.

Sunset Curve were the opening act. The band took to the stage and Reggie felt the lights come up on his face. He adored performing. He loved letting himself go, shredding on his bass, enjoying himself and making the audience enjoy themselves too. He met Flynn’s eye as Alex counted them in – she was sat in the front row beside Julie, right in front of Reggie. She gave him a reassuring smile; it made Reggie feel like he could do anything.

They played their set and Reggie thought it was the best they’d ever played. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he was pretty sure he noticed a few important-looking music industry people nodding to each other as the lights went down on Sunset Curve.

Reggie packed away his bass – it took longer than it should have because his hands were shaking with the excitement and adrenaline. Soon though, he joined the audience and took the place Flynn had saved him.

“That was amazing,” she gushed, “you guys rocked!”

“Yeah we did!” he exclaimed, grinning as he gave her a fist-bump.

Eventually, the interval was announced, so he and Flynn made their way to the other hall to get snacks. Flynn had been on the committee that had planned the Showcase and on Reggie’s suggestion she had made sure there were a dozen different types of pizza available to eat. Reggie and Flynn piled their plates high and found an empty table to sit at.

“So,” Flynn said, trying and failing to sound casual, “according to the plans for tonight, Dirty Candi is the next act to perform.”

Reggie raised an eyebrow but Flynn was avoiding eye contact. “Oh?” he prompted.

Flynn nodded. “Oh.”

Reggie followed her line of sight. On the other side of the hall, Carrie Wilson and the rest of Dirty Candi were grouped together. By the looks of it, Carrie was giving them all a pep talk. Flynn was practically starry-eyed.

“You should go talk to her,” Reggie suggested.

Flynn’s eyes blew wide. “What? Are you insane?”

“No,” Reggie said, “but I think your methods are all wrong. Last time you tried to get her attention by supergluing her locker shut – maybe this time try being nice to her? Tell her you’re excited to see her perform, that you’re sure she’ll be great.”

Flynn opened her mouth as if to protest but then sighed. “Fine. You’re right. I’ll be back in a moment.”

As Flynn headed over to Carrie, Reggie was joined by Julie and Luke (who were smiling brightly at each other, hardly bothering looking towards anyone else) and Alex and Willie (who looked slightly dishevelled and out of breath, which Reggie decided not to comment on, but he did send a knowing wink to Alex, who blushed).

“Hey Reg,” said Luke.

“What’s Flynn doing?” Julie asked.

“She’s talking to Carrie,” Reggie said.

Julie rolled her eyes. “Finally.”

Reggie watched as a beaming Flynn headed back towards the group, leaving a blushing Carrie behind. In his peripheral vision, he saw Alex wave excitedly at Carrie and give her a thumbs-up. He’d ask him about that later.

“Did it go well?” he asked Flynn as she sat back down.

“Well,” Flynn said, “she didn’t spit in my face and tell me to get lost, so that’s positive, right?”

Reggie smiled. “I’m happy for you.”

“Me too. Hey,” Flynn said, addressing the group, “after the rest of the Showcase, do you guys all want to come back to my place? Now that we’ve all finally figured this soulmate thing out it only seems right that we all get to know each other.”

Alex and Willie exchanged a look that Reggie couldn’t read. Willie took Alex’s hand and spoke for the both of them, saying, “There’s something we have to do tonight, we’re not sure how long it’ll take. But if we’re done in time then yeah, totally. We’d love to.”

Flynn beamed. “Great! Julie, Luke?”

Luke smiled down at Julie. “There’s something I need to do too, Julie’s going to come with me. But yeah, when we’re done we’ll be there.”

Flynn turned to Reggie. “And you?”

Reggie grinned. “Do you even have to ask?”

And so together, the six of them headed back into the main hall. Three pairs of soulmates, all best friends, all in love in one way or another and Reggie thought again: Yes, this is how it’s supposed to be.

Throughout Dirty Candi’s performance, Reggie was subjected to watching Flynn make heart-eyes at the stage, clearly entranced. He considered her situation yet again – she was his soulmate, so that meant she wouldn’t have a romantic soulmate. But did that have to mean that she couldn’t be somebody else’s romantic soulmate? If she was lucky, Reggie thought, Flynn could be Carrie’s soulmate. He’d heard of one-sided soulmates being a thing, so there was no reason for it not to apply.

Judging by the way Carrie had been blushing after Flynn walked away from her at the interval, it was a distinct possibility.

After the Showcase was totally finished and the curtains had closed, Flynn and Reggie bade goodbye to their friends who were all going off to do their own mysterious things and hopped into Reggie’s car.

“Can we stop by my place first?” Reggie asked as he started the engine. “I need to grab some overnight stuff.”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” Flynn replied. “You should start keeping some clothes and a toothbrush at mine, you sleep over often enough.”

They both laughed, but in his head Reggie was already planning what he’d leave at Flynn’s house.

A while later, Reggie pulled up at his house and headed inside. When he had left to go to the Showcase, both of his parents had been out, but now he could see the lights were on in the front room, which meant they were back. He smiled to himself, thinking that they’d see his suit and ask where he’d been and he’d get to tell them all about the Showcase and how he’d enjoyed his evening with his friends, especially Flynn, and they’d finally take enough interest to ask who Flynn was and he’d be able to say, “Oh, she’s my soulmate.”

But he could hear their raised voices as soon as he neared the front door.

They were fighting again.

Quiet as possible, suddenly feeling deflated and not wanting to see his parents at all, Reggie made his way upstairs and packed some pyjamas, a toothbrush, and his phone charger into a rucksack. He stowed his bass away in its usual spot on the floor before stealthily making his way out of his bedroom again.

He was unlucky – on his way downstairs he forgot about the creaky step, the one that sounded like a dying cat, and he announced his presence loudly even over the sound of their arguing.

“Let’s see what Reginald thinks then, shall we?”

“Fine. Reginald, come here now!”

Reggie sighed haggardly and hung his head. “Great,” he muttered to himself.

His parents were waiting in the front room, his mother on one side, his father on the other. Both were facing him with furious expressions, their arms crossed at their chests. Reggie looked between them, waiting for one of them to say something.

“Would you please explain to your father that if we don’t have the money to spend on food each week then we definitely don’t have the money to waste in casinos.”

“Now hang on a minute,” Reggie’s father interrupted before Reggie could say anything himself. “I never said–”

“You may as well have done–”

“–you are making completely false accusations–”

“–don’t know why I bother–”

And they were at it again, screaming and pointing, all but forgetting that this time Reggie was right there watching. He hated it, all of it, it was all too much. The noise, the arguments, the stony silences in between, none of it was right.

“Guys,” he said weakly. Then louder, “Mom, dad!” But they still didn’t hear him.

He’d had enough. He’d reached his breaking point.

“ _Listen to me_!” he yelled.

Both his parents turned to look at him, astounded. Reggie understood why – it wasn’t in his nature to shout, and usually when they brought him in to try and settle an argument he wouldn’t say a word. For once, his parents weren’t silent because they were simmering in anger; they were silent because they were seeing their son for the first time.

He took a deep breath and began.

“Just stop it. If all you ever do is argue then why are you still together? You clearly don’t care about each other at all, and you don’t care about me. If you did, you’d stop dragging me into your stupid arguments; you would have known that I found my soulmate a few weeks ago, that she’s great, and that she’s the best thing to ever happen to me; you would have noticed that I’m wearing a suit. I had a gig tonight, it was pretty big, the band could have a real shot. But you don’t care so you don’t know because you haven’t asked. Just do what’s best for all of us and get a divorce.”

He shouldered his bag with a huff and headed out the front door. Getting it off his chest felt good – he felt freer. But he also felt more trapped. Especially when neither of his parents called him back inside and the moment he closed the front door her could hear them shouting again.

He clambered back into his car, throwing his bag into the backseat, and started the engine, ready to drive away, but Flynn’s hand grabbed his before he could do anything. He didn’t look at her.

“Okay, when you went in you were smiling, but now you look like somebody killed a puppy right in front of you,” Flynn said. “What happened? What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing,” Reggie said, trying for a smile that he knew he didn’t achieve. “I’m really fine.”

Flynn gave him a flat look and threw her car door open so Reggie couldn’t drive away. “We’re not going anywhere until you tell me what’s up.”

He sighed. “I just… I told my parents everything on my mind. I told them they should get a divorce. I don’t think any of it meant anything to them. I don’t think they care.”

Flynn gently pulled him into a side-hug and he rested his head on her shoulder.

“Even if they don’t care,” she said quietly, “you have an entire family of intertwined soulmates who do. I should know – I’m one of them. Reggie, you know that me, Luke, Alex, and their soulmates would do anything for you. We love you. We’re proud of you. We’re your family and nothing could ever change that. Please tell me you know that.”

Reggie sniffed and nodded. “I know,” he breathed.

“Don’t let your parents ruin tonight. You had fun at the Showcase, right? You and your band put yourselves out there, got yourselves seen by plenty of record execs – you could start getting calls any day now! And right now, you’re not going back to your parents. You’re coming home with me, and together with the rest of our family we’re going to have fun and enjoy ourselves. That’s what really matters. Don’t let one family spoil your time with your other.”

Reggie smiled.

“You know,” he said gently, “I never trusted the soulmate system. I didn’t think it really worked – you know, there was my parents, then Luke and Julie weren’t working, then Alex struggled a bit with Willie… Maybe the universe doesn’t always get soulmates spot on. But it definitely did with you and I. Thank you, Flynn.”

He felt Flynn hug him that little bit tighter.

“Thank _you_ , Reggie.”

Yes. The universe had definitely outdone itself this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like it's important to mention that Reggie and Flynn's outfits for the Showcase were matching and Flynn and Julie were the ones who designed and made them. Also they have matching pyjamas.
> 
> Sorry the first few paragraphs or so were a little messy, I rewrote this chapter like three times and could never find a good way to start it off.
> 
> Anyway, that's the end of Reggie's story! I hope you enjoyed it, I'm really happy with his journey throughout this.


	10. Epilogue - Perfect Harmony

Julie sat in the passenger seat of Luke’s car, directing him down this road and that to Flynn’s house. They were on their way back from Luke’s parents’ house – Luke had finally played Unsaid Emily to his mother.

He was moving back home at the weekend.

It had been an emotional evening all round. Performing Perfect Harmony with Luke had sent a whirlwind of emotions coursing through Julie, most of which she didn’t understand and didn’t bother trying to process.

Then Luke had taken her back to his childhood home, he’d knocked on the door with his acoustic guitar slung over his shoulder, and a middle-aged man had answered it.

“Luke,” the man had said disbelievingly, “you’re home.”

“Yeah,” Luke had said breathlessly. “Is mom here?”

The man had led Luke and Julie through the house to the living room and soon a woman came through from the kitchen. Luke introduced everyone – “Mom, dad, this is my soulmate, Julie. Julie, these are my parents, Mitch and Emily.”

And Luke had sung his song.

Julie had felt like it was almost too private a moment. Maybe she shouldn’t have been there, maybe this was between Luke and his parents only. But when Luke finished his song on a shaky exhale, he took Julie’s hand and she’d known in that moment that he had needed her there.

Mitch and Emily had welcomed their son back with open arms.

After tearful goodbyes, Luke and Julie had clambered back into Luke’s car and made their way to Flynn’s to meet up with the rest of their friends. They pulled up outside Flynn’s house and Julie led Luke inside.

They found Reggie and Flynn piled together on a beanbag, wearing matching pyjamas, sobbing over Disney’s Frozen. Julie and Luke threw themselves onto the sofa, huddled together as they watched the final few scenes.

It was a while before Alex and Willie joined them. They both looked a little teary-eyed but overall happy, so Julie and the others didn’t ask where they had been.

After they put Frozen 2 on, Reggie ordered them pizzas (“It’s not a proper movie marathon if we’re not eating pizza. And I want to watch Star Wars next!”) and Julie helped Flynn microwave far too many bags of popcorn.

They brought all the snacks through, and Julie looked around at her friends. Flynn, her best friend, with her soulmate Reggie, both looking as happy as imaginable as they talked about Star Wars; Alex, who she hadn’t known for long, but knew well enough to understand that he deserved to be happy, and Willie certainly made him that; then Luke, who came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her in a protective hug, holding her close.

Julie Molina and the universe did not see eye to eye, which was entirely the reason she had sworn off soulmates forever, including her own. But she couldn’t deny that she had been sent the best friends she could have asked for – the best _family_.

Maybe, just for that, she and the universe could call it even.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it! We're done! This chapter was very short but that's because I didn't want to drag it out, I wanted it all nicely wrapped up.
> 
> Over the December break, I am considering planning a part two to this where the POVs would be Luke, Willie, and Flynn. If you would like to see that, or if you have any suggestions about it, I would love to hear your thoughts! Either leave a comment here, or drop me an ask/DM on my Tumblr, @gaylebcovington!
> 
> Thank you for reading! This was my first JatP fic and my first chaptered fic so I'm very glad that you all enjoyed it. Lots of love!

**Author's Note:**

> I have a bad habit of not proof-reading, so please let me know if anything is wrong, thank you!  
> This fic is complete - I will be updating daily until all 10 chapters are posted.  
> I'd love to know your thoughts, so leave them in the comments!  
> Find me on Tumblr: @gaylebcovington  
> (Main: @yonderlands)


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